Sunday e-mail 28th April: Blimey; Flippin’ ‘eck
Why Cocaine Bear is the greatest crime film ever made. A grab-bag bullet-list.
‘If it’s a crime film, it’s a Flippin’ ‘eck film.’
Or so you might think. Crime films do tend mostly in the direction of Flippin’ ‘eck.[i] Don’t knock it - it’s just their nature. But sometimes the best go against type. You buy your popcorn, settle into your cinema seat, prepare yourself for a bit of Flippin’ ‘eck, and, next thing you know, it’s Blimey[ii] from beginning to end.
Remember The Godfather? By all that’s holy, a film about mafia families ought most definitely to be Flippin’ ‘eck. But, in that long-ago 1972, when the audience emerged from the picture-house amid flares, miniskirts, and second-hand cigarette smoke, they were shaking their sideburns and saying ‘Blimey!’ Think of Heat; think of Pulp Fiction. Blimey films, both.
Crime films share a theme with horror films. That theme is disruption. Disruption requires a source. In horror films, the source might be a vampire, a demon, a maniac in a hockey mask. It doesn’t matter which. It has just one job to do - make you say ‘Flippin’ ‘eck!’ (Indeed, horror films fail to the extent that they fail to make you say ‘Flippin’ ‘eck!’) Your crime film, though…your crime film’s more complex, more subtle. That’s because the source of disruption is far more flexible. Identify with it enough – admire it enough – and suddenly you’re all, like, ‘Blimey!’
That’s cinema at its best.
Now, let’s not run away with the idea that there are no great Flippin’ ‘eck films, or even - perish forfend! – that Flippin’ ‘eck is somehow less respectable than Blimey. Certainly not. Some Flippin’ ‘eck films are wonderful. Indeed, one of the best has the very word in the title. It’s A Wonderful Life is an out-and-out Flippin’ ‘eck film with a smiley bit tacked on at the end to make you remember it as the Blimey film it never was and could never be.
And some Blimey films are just terrible. Three Weddings and a Funeral springs to mind. Indeed, the worst Blimey films may be worse than the worst Flippin’ ‘eck films. Think of The Last Action Hero, for instance, or Justice League.
Few films manage successfully to combine Blimey and Flippin’ ‘eck. Very few indeed. Among crime films, Cocaine Bear stands alone as the champion: the best crime film ever made.
At the great Academy Awards in the sky, the Oscar for Very Best Film goes annually to one that transcends its roots in Flippin’ ‘eck, reaches inside, and extracts the Blimey. You can count such films on your fingers. Take Citizen Kane. While it looks Flippin’ ‘eck, sheer directorial brilliance rips out the Blimey for all to see. When a director magically finds the Blimey inside the Flippin’ ‘eck…well, it’s a sign of something greater even than brilliance. It’s a sign of…what to call it? Humanity, perhaps. Generosity. I only realised today the reason why Roberto Benigni’s 1997 masterpiece, Life is Beautiful (La Vita è Bella) is my favourite film.
This week’s bullet list? I’m glad you reminded me. Here are five things I’ve noticed this week:
MIDDLE EAST: Did you see the news? Central London police threatened to arrest a man walking home from synagogue because he was ‘openly Jewish’. A pro-Palestinian march was going on nearby. There have been predictable Twitter (X) spats, of course, and calls for resignations. I was about to write a bullet point protesting the whole incident, but an article in yesterday’s Times caused me to reconsider. We should pay attention, said the article, to what people mean rather than the particular words they happen to employ: and what the police officer meant was to prevent trouble. Perhaps that’s right. For sure, social media makes it far too easy to become outraged at others’ choice of words. We try to avoid performative outrage, here at Crime & Psychology!
PODCAST: Thanks to Tracy at True Crime Fiction, I just finished a podcast called In the Dark (Flippin’ ‘eck from start to finish). It’s grim but good. I liked the way it panned out from close-up details of one very specific crime to take in widescreen, nationwide law-enforcement. This is well worth a listen.
COMICS: Suddenly my house finds itself in the grip of Bat-mania. I finished Glen Weldon’s excellent book, The Caped Crusade: Batman & the Rise of Nerd Culture. Yes, I’m a nerd, and, no, I’ve never denied it. The book had me checking out the well-known 1960s TV series. It’s better than you remember. And the theme tune…well, that’s much, much better than you remember. It is, in fact, kinda cool. What else would you expect from Neil Hefti?
SUBSTACK: I hope you enjoyed and availed yourself of the incredible INDEX I published last Sunday. It struck me that new readers, in particular, might enjoy the chance to catch up on all those nifty newsletters and swingin’ Sunday e-mails they might’ve missed. But even if you’re one of our long-term Keepers of the Flame, make sure you bookmark the Index so you can keep coming back to it. Crime & Psychology: it’s good to you and it’s good for you!
ACADEMIA: Finally – at long, long last – it’s the end of the academic year. Nearly. That means most of my courses end. And my Masters student is making excellent progress. What does that mean for you? Only that I’ll be able to devote a little more time over the coming months to this Substack. So, expect the same great material that you’ve grown to love, but more! But better! Faster, stronger, longer, bigger, wider, and built to last a lifetime. Make sure you’re here for the greatest developments yet in everyone’s favourite Superstack!
Till next time, Crime & Psychology fans! Before then, remember to bash a blue button below!
[i] Mostly British. ‘Shock, surprise, intense emotional reaction.’ ‘Heck’ is a euphemism for ‘hell’ and ‘flippin’’ means exactly what you think it does.
[ii] Informal, British. Contraction, I believe, of ‘Lord, blind me’. Used when one wants to express wonder or excitement or alarm at objects or events that are well out of the ordinary.
I'm so glad you enjoyed (right verb? probably not--appreciated?) In the Dark! I think it's one of the greats. And congratulations on finishing your semester (nearly)!